Louis describes going through the whirling feelings of being stuck in violence—the heavy influence of helplessness and fear, the underpinnings of compassion within his guilt, and above all, his determination to change.
As his friends got out on probation and their victim started to recover, Louis was left to wrestle with immense and challenging feelings about what was going on. He felt guilty that he had hurt someone who didn’t deserve it. He was afraid of losing a group of friends that had meant a lot to him. He felt helpless to stop them from perpetrating further violence.
He wanted to be better but he didn’t know how.
As he started seeking forgiveness and building a relationship with Matthew, he had to go through the challenge of forging a new friendship, and he had to figure out if it was still possible to hang out with guys whom he no longer trusted. Perhaps most importantly, he had to face himself.
Listen to Louis unpack those feelings with me, and share from the heart about his uncertain experience of not being defined by his past, and instead being committed to his future.